I'm lagging behind in my article postings and I apologize! My daughter had surgery to remove her portacath. She is refusing further treatment. She has an amazing heart and brave spirit.

I heard a woman's sad story about how her husband of 50+ years confessed on his deathbed that he had been having an affair that lasted for most of their marriage. What a cruel and selfish act, I thought. When he died, she was left to sort out her feelings of betrayal and anger all alone. For more than 50 years, she believed she had the perfect marriage only to find herself at the end of her life looking back at the sham he created. Unanswered questions. Haunting images.

It made me think about honesty in marriage. Research shows that over 80 percent of couples lie to each other. I would like to do more research to learn why and about what married couples lie before I write the next article but meanwhile, this week's article is about things not to tell your spouse.

As for this woman's predicament, I can't help but think that it would have been a kindness for her husband to take his guilt to his grave. But then would you want to grieve for a man who had deceived you for decades and a marriage that was based on a lie? Come and post in our forum to share your thoughts about this.

http://forums.bellaonline.com/ubbthreads.php?ubb=postlist&Board=37

Here's the latest article from the Marriage site at BellaOnline.com.

Things Not to Tell Your Mate
Complete honesty is good marriage advice, but it is a kindness not to share everything.

http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art16127.asp

Truly,
Lori Phillips, Marriage Editor
http://marriage.bellaonline.com

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