Guest Author - Sandy Mullins

Gossiping and backbiting are, two things that we must all learn to be free of. Growing up one of the many phrases that I learned early from my maternal grandmother was “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say nothing at all.”

Yes I do catch myself in the cycle of gossiping. We are taught too early on. We tease each other as children, telling stories of things either true or if we had no dirt on someone we made it up. Yes, I know you did because every child I ever knew did that. Some of us become better people and stop doing it, some just seem to get worse and worse about it.

Baha’u’llah talked about gossip. He referred it as backbiting. If you think about it that is a very good use of the word. When some person’s back is turned, you say something about them that would hurt them as a bite it they hear it. Some of us don’t think the poor soul ever will hear the bad talk others unfortunately don’t care if they do.

I was one of those children that was talked about, stories told about the odd kid out. If life wasn’t a test enough for me, kids and people had to make it worse. But, alas that was another one of the many test God had planned for me and that is another story another day.

Should we backbite or gossip? Whether you see nothing, wrong with it or not it can be a painful thing for the recipients of the gossip. Usually what is being said about the person isn’t true, the story changes from person to person.

Baha’u’llah tells us that, “. . . backbiting as grievous error, and keep himself aloof from its dominion, inasmuch as backbiting quencheth the light of the heart, and extinguisheth the life of the soul.”
(Baha'u'llah, Gleanings from the Writings of Baha'u'llah, p. 265)


Bahá'u'lláh, in the Hidden Words, He clearly states:
"O Son of Being!
How couldst thou forget thine own faults and busy thyself with the faults of others?
Whoso doeth this is accursed of Me."

And again:
"O Son of Man!
Breathe not the sins of others so long as thou art thyself a sinner.
Shouldst thou transgress this command, accursed wouldst thou be, and to this I bear witness." This strong admonition is further reiterated in His last work, "the Book of My Covenant":
"Verily I say, the tongue is for mentioning what is good, defile it not with unseemly talk.
God hath forgiven what is past.
Henceforward everyone should utter that which is meet and seemly, and should refrain from slander, abuse and whatever causeth sadness in men."
(Baha'u'llah, The Kitab-i-Aqdas, p. 181)

God! In wealth fear is concealed and peril is hidden. Behold and then reflect upon that which the Merciful One hath revealed in the Qur'án: "Woe unto every maligner and backbiter who heapeth up riches and counteth them over."
(Compilations, Baha'i Scriptures, p. 259)


Other writings tell us:
It is particularly important to refrain from making unfavourable remarks or statements concerning the friends and the loved ones of God, inasmuch as any expression of grievance, of complaint or backbiting is incompatible with the requirements of unity and harmony and would dampen the spirit of love, fellowship and nobility.
(Compilations, Bahiyyih Khanum, p. 196)

"As regards backbiting, i.e. discussing the faults of others in their absence, the teachings are very emphatic. In a Tablet to an American friend the Master wrote: 'The worst human quality and the most great sin is backbiting, more especially when it emanates from the tongues of the believers of God. If some means were devised so that the doors of backbiting were shut eternally and each one of the believers unsealed his lips in praise of others, then the Teachings of His Holiness Bahá'u'lláh would spread, the hearts be illumined, the spirits glorified, and the human world would attain to everlasting felicity.' (Quoted in Star of West, Vol. IV. p. 192) Bahá'u'lláh says in Hidden Words; 'Breathe not the sins of others so long as thou art a sinner. Shouldst thou transgress this command ACCURSED ARE THOU.' The condemnation of backbiting could hardly be couched in stronger language than in these passages, and it is obviously one of the foremost obligations for Bahá'ís to set their faces against this practice. Even if what is said against another person be true, the mentioning of his faults to others still comes under the category of backbiting, and is forbidden."
(Compilations, Lights of Guidance, p. 88)

If some means were devised so that the doors of backbiting could be shut eternally, and each one of the believers of God unsealed his lips in praise of others, then the teachings of His Holiness Bahá'u'lláh would be spread, the hearts illumined, the spirits glorified, and the human world would attain to everlasting felicity.
(Dr. J.E. Esslemont, Baha'u'llah and the New Era, p. 83)

Remember, above all, the teaching of Bahá'u'lláh concerning gossip and unseemly talk about others. Stories repeated about others are seldom good. A silent tongue is the safest. Even good may be harmful, if spoken at the wrong time, or to the wrong person.
(Abdu'l-Baha, Abdu'l-Baha in London, p. 125)

So should you gossip? How about throwing the first stone? Just like Jesus said “He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone...” I take that liberally, whether it be the stone or the word of mouth. I know I am not perfect, only God is perfect, but we should strive to be more like him (or her).

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