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Annamaria Farbizio
BellaOnline's Writing for Children Editor

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Tense Issues
Guest Author - Sally Apokedak



It didn't use to be much of a problem for novelists. Everyone wrote in past tense. First person past tense, or third person past tense.

Past Tense—First Person:

Yesterday I hit the ball, kicked the cat, and ate the pancakes.

Past Tense—Third Person:

Yesterday Timmy hit the ball, kicked the cat, and ate the pancakes.


I'm not sure who changed all that. Bright Lights, Big City was an early present tense book.

Present Tense—First Person:

Today I hit the ball, kick the cat, and eat the pancakes.


Present Tense—Third Person:

Today Timmy hits the ball, kicks the cat, and eats the pancakes.


To make matters worse, Bright Lights, Big City was written in the second person. Yikes! It drives me nuts!

Present Tense—Second Person:

Today you hit the ball, kick the cat, and eat the pancakes.


Now present tense is done often enough that I've gotten use to it. Thankfully the second person has never caught on.

In children's picture books and short stories, present tense works well because small children can relate to a character on an ongoing journey. They like to walk along through the character's day with the character.

Past tense is the most common tense for fiction writers and probably one editors want new writers to use. It's comfortable. It's been proven. Still, you can use whatever you want, yes, even the dreaded present tense, second person as long as you do it well. You have to be consistent. You may not change tenses mid-story, mid-chapter, or mid-paragraph.

What can you do if you have tense problems? I think reading the manuscript aloud will clue you in. Your ears will hear what your eyes have not, to borrow and pervert a phrase from Nicholas Nickleby. (Have you seen the Disney film? Do you remember him angrily making it clear that he had no intention of marrying the young Miss Squeers?


Nicholas: Does your friend think I'm in love with her?

Tilda: Does she think so? Of course.

Nicholas: But I have made no such declaration.

Tilda: Your eyes said what your mouth could not.

Nicholas: Perhaps my mouth should say what my eyes have not. I have scarcely seen the lady three times but should I have seen her 30 or 30,000, it would be the same. I have not one thought, hope or wish connected with her unless it is part of the picture I keep in my mind of one day being able to turn my back upon this accursed place and never to think of it again with any feeling but loathing and disgust.


Nicholas has no trouble expressing his opinions, eh? Perhaps an article on characterization is in order. But for now, back to tense. Read your work aloud. It will do wonders for you.


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Content copyright © 2009 by Sally Apokedak. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Sally Apokedak. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Annamaria Farbizio for details.

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