For the last 17 or 18 years, you and your student have been steady companions. The road to this point wasn't always easy; and there were likely times when you thought your relationship with your budding adult was pushed to its absolute limits. However thin the ties may have been stretched, the bond between you--the parent--and your student remained constant. Now, just when your student has finally come back around to seeing you as a person and you think you've finally got a handle on the whole parenting thing, your student is making plans to move away. What do you do?
First, understand that your student's transition to college can be as traumatic for him/her as it is for you. There are many things that you, as a parent, can do to ease the stress of the transition to college; prepare them to move on; get them ready for fall; and assist them with surviving their freshman year.
Before your student heads off to college, make sure you prepare him/her emotionally. You need to address more than the issue of whether or not their quest for a college degree will break your bank. Sit down with your student and have that one last important talk before he/she goes. Let them know you understand they will have competing priorities in the future (courses, roommates, dating and other issues); but no matter what's going on in their life, you will always be there to help them evaluate their priorities and weigh their decisions.
Your student has done so much just to get into college. Their new bid for independence will succeed with your support. College can be a magical experience for your student, if you're willing to take that step back and allow your student to move onwards.
To all of you who will experience the joy and trauma of a student leaving home for higher ed. this summer, I salute you!
Until next time!
Lynn Byrne
Preparing for college admissions? Trying to find direction? Need a little help with the planning? Check out my college planning series:
- College Planning Made Easy--the planning and preparation workbook for the take charge, college-bound student,
- Paying for College Made Easy--a college financing guide designed to assist students and families in preparing and planning for higher education expenses; and
- The Great Scholarship Search--my guide for students and parents researching and applying for scholarship funding.
