Why we need to listen to our daughters

Our daughters can tell us more than about their day. They are a wealth of information that span beyond their likes and dislikes. I learned after an outing with my eleven year old recently that listening to her was so much fun and over lunch I had the opportunity to hear about her recent days since the start of the sixth grade and in doing so it brought back found memories of being a middle schooler.

We are never too old to hear a story about any topic of conversation that our daughters and their friends have. Didn’t we rush home eager to tell our moms the unexpected things that happened to us during the day?

What is more fun than…

…to hear her version of lunch time tales where they count how many times they use the same words in a sentence?

…to hear her dilemma of trying to carry her instrument and books around school?

…to hear her proclaim that she notices the pimples you’ve said you can’t see?

…to hear her talk about the funny things a boy does in class?

…to hear how a good teacher makes them laugh…and learn?

Remember when you were that old? You wondered if your mom heard you, listened or cared about the good laugh you had with friends.

Now’s the time to hear, listen and laugh with her.

The easiest way to do this is to get out with her. Sometimes we are so busy with housework, work, running errands and taking care of siblings that we miss out on what seems the smallest of things to us but what is naturally a big deal to our daughters in their teenage or approaching teenage years.

At our recent lunch date she was eager to tell tales out of school and share all the fun she was having. We weren’t struggling through homework or constantly being interrupted by her two younger sisters.

I learned recently from a friend who has older daughters how she thought it was great that my daughter was such a conversationalist after school. Of course this is usually the time I’m trying to get her to think about homework. But when we have a chance to get beyond the homework expectations are we encouraging discussion?

There are no special rules or particular books to give us any insight into what we need to do. Plain and simple we just need to listen...and enjoy.