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Violette DeSantis
BellaOnline's Daughters Editor

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Raising Old Fashioned Daughters
Guest Author - Terrie Lynn Bittner

Today’s girl is supposed to plan for a high powered career, play with trucks and soldiers, and hold her own in a fight against boys. She is asked to be good at math, fix a car, and even swear or takes foolish risks.

Not all parents want this for their daughters. A growing number of mothers are rebelling against the new kind of girl and would love to have a daughter who is sweet and feminine, who dreams of being a stay at home mom, and who loves to bake cookies—in between solving a physics problem and after she gets out of the tree she is climbing.

Moms don’t need to go all the way back to the fifties, which weren’t quite as portrayed anyway. There are ways to raise a feminine daughter while still taking advantage of the benefits of modern life.

Femininity often begins with clothing. Thanks to the internet, it’s possible to find pretty, practical dresses for daughters who want to be totally old-fashioned. If they’re okay with pants, old-fashioned femininity can be found in lacy tops and girlish colors. Some businesses specialize in modest clothing for those girls who don’t consider Brittney Spears a role model.

Old-fashioned manners are appreciated everywhere, even if they’re not commonly practiced. Teach your old-fashioned daughter to say please and thank you, to assist people who are older, and to gently care for younger children.

Give your old-fashioned daughter lots of dolls, housekeeping toys, and books about old-fashioned girls, who can serve as role-models. While it’s important for boys to learn to cook and clean, a little extra effort can be put into the training of the girls. Mom sets the example by never putting down her own role as a traditional mother. If she models the attitude that serving her family is fulfilling and enriching, her daughters will follow suit.

The old argument of wasting a mind can be put to rest when Mom learns the science behind her cooking or gardening, studies natural medications, or learns for the fun of it. When she passes her knowledge onto her children, they see a purpose for learning history and science. This is why many old-fashioned moms homeschool. They have a special opportunity to demonstrate that all those academics were valuable. However, even traditionally schooled children benefit when Mom can chat with them about their history course. Girls can be taught, as I was, that career preparation and education matter, because not all girls have a chance to stay home, but that when given a choice, raising a family is the most extraordinary opportunity any woman can have.

When Dad teaches the brothers to treat their mother and sisters in old-fashioned ways, the girl learns to enjoy being feminine and the boys learn to value old-fashioned women. This is important, because unless there are old-fashioned boys, our old-fashioned girls won’t be able to live the life they were trained for.

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Content copyright © 2008 by Terrie Lynn Bittner. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Terrie Lynn Bittner. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Violette DeSantis for details.

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