Guest Author - Isabelle Harman

Choosing To Stay Home or Go To Work

Over the years there has been an increased perception that women prefer to work. If given the choice to stay home with their children or find a high-powered, high-paying job they would choose the latter. Why does this perception linger?

The women’s liberation movement has brought much good in this world for women. But has it also brought a stigma to many women who choose to stay home? Often many are consumed with guilt because they are not earning a salary. Never mind the overused cliché “stay at home mom” or “moms are the hardest working people in the world, they deserve more recognition”. Blah, blah, blah…

There’s a lot to be said for women who choose to stay home. But the reality is mothers who stay home are not facing the same level of responsibility that women of the early 20th century had to face – at least not in “western societies”. Life is much easier because of the conveniences of modern times. Because of choices, staying home is no longer a privilege. It is in every sense of the word – a choice. Choosing to put family before career.

Now let’s go to the flip side of the coin. Women who choose to work – are they getting what they deserve - the stress, the jam-packed schedules, the rewards of working “outside of the home”? What does all of this bring to an individual? If they are in a strong relationship with someone who is willing to share the load, both can be successful and have a happy family. This is ideal for many. But others find themselves in the wonder woman suit trying to fly around in an invisible jet called “women’s liberation”.

This isn’t an attempt to dismiss a woman’s right to choose her lifestyle. This is an effort to discuss the ability of a woman’s right to choose her role in society without being ridiculed for the decision she makes.

It’s easy to point your finger at someone else and feel sorry for them because they chose to stay home with family or go to work full-time. It’s too easy to jump into the pity me rut of “I’m not satisfied with my life but I guess I have to keep on going because it’s my fate”. This is not what the women who fought for choice expected. This is not what women who continue the fight expect. There is no pity party for choices.

The next time you think about complaining because you chose to be a stay at home mom or a working mother, remember the women who have to work because they don’t have a choice. That person could be your next-door neighbor or a woman who lives on the other side of the world.

Be thankful for the ability to choose. If you want a change, make a plan and put it to work.