Guest Author - Donna Johnson
Criminals may be caught in a number of different ways. Tips from the public, eyewitness accounts, and good old-fashioned detective work by the police can land the guilty party behind bars. However, the easiest busts come when a criminal is just dumb enough to tell on himself.
Take 29-year-old Stephen Culbertson of Louisville, Kentucky, for instance. In 2011, Culbertson went to a strip club, where he allegedly offered one of the dancers $40 to perform oral sex on him. When the dancer refused, police say Culbertson then contacted them and tried to make a police report against her for theft of services. Of course, the only person sitting in the back of a police car that night was Culbertson, who avoided a charge of solicitation of prostitution, but was arrested and charged with public intoxication.
Francisco Castro, 25, of Iowa, apparently knows that drunk driving is not a good idea. Like a good citizen, police say Castro gave them a call in 2010 to report an intoxicated driver on the road before that person could harm someone else or himself. But the drunk driver Castro called about was allegedly Castro himself. Police report that Castro had a blood alcohol level of 0.220, over twice the legal limit, as well as an open container of hard liquor in the vehicle. Castro allegedly told the arresting officer that he called 911 on himself because he felt too drunk to drive.
Believe it or not, Castro wasn’t the first drunk driver said to have reported himself. Others have been accused of making this colossally dumb move, including Mary Strey of Wisconsin. In the 911 call this 49-year-old woman made in 2009, she allegedly told the dispatcher “I am them” when asked if she was behind “them”--referring to the drunk driver she was calling to report.
Finally, while most bank robbers flee the scene as soon as possible, hoping against hope that their bag of loot doesn’t contain a dye pack, police in Tampa Bay, Florida say Nancy Waro not only stuck around, but also invited them to the party. Police allege that the 52-year-old woman robbed a teller of $1900 then called 911 on herself while still in the bank in 2010.
Criminals who are nice enough to tell on themselves certainly cut down on the police’s workload and make solving crimes much easier. However, since the aim of even the most inexperienced of all wrongdoers should be to stay away from the police at all costs, these honest criminals only lead the rest of us to ask, “What was he/she THINKING?”