Guest Author - Vance R. Rowe
It’s time again for a stupid criminals article and we are going to start off with a good one.
Many of you may have heard about the crystal meth hoax perpetrated by a police department in Granite Shoals, Texas. They made a “Breaking News” post on their Facebook page announcing that a local heroin and crystal meth have been found to be contaminated with Ebola. The report also said that some of the ingredients used to make the heroin and crystal meth have been tainted with the Ebola virus as well. The report went on to tell people to bring their drugs in to be tested.
Well, one woman did just that. She got scared of the warning and brought her heroin to the police station to be tested. They tested the substance she brought in and then she was arrested for having a controlled substance. However, while some people thought this funny, others called it entrapment. What do you think? Were the police justified in this sting operation?
In Laverton, West Australia, thieves got a mouthful…of poop. That’s right. Apparently a thief tried to siphon gas from a gas tank on but made the mistake of trying to siphon from the sewage line instead. The thief or thieves got out of there quickly, probably to brush his teeth and drink a quart of mouthwash. Comically, the police department said “they have no interest in retrieving the stolen goods.”
A woman in Port St. Lucie, Florida was arrested for battery on her husband. She began elbowing him and kicking him while they were in bed together. Apparently the husband’s excessive passing of the gas angered the woman and she went to beating on him for it. Police were finally called and they arrested the wife on the charge of battery. Excessive flatulence is not a crime and the husband was not arrested.
I think we will finish up with one of my favorites. This girl is not a stupid criminal but she did call 911 for a non-emergency. The 7-year-old girl however, thought it was an emergency. She was throwing a ball around while her father was at work and her mother was taking a nap on the couch. She accidentally knocked something off of a shelf and then panicked after she picked it up and put it back on the shelf. She thought she ruined Christmas for her family. That’s right, she touched the Elf on the Shelf and in the children story, if you touch the Elf on the Shelf, Santa gets mad and doesn’t come to your house.
She had attempted to call her father and apologized to the 911 operator for calling them and begged them not to send a police officer. However, it is their protocol to send an officer to check the call out. Her mother awoke from the nap as her daughter was trying to get the policeman to leave. She apologized for calling 911 and said she will never do that again.