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The Five Love Languages

Guest Author - Lisa Shea

Dr. Gary Chapman has written several books about the Five Love Languages. According to these books, relationships can prosper if we listen to each other properly.

These are not foreign languages, but rather manners of asking for attention from each other. If you listen to what a person says and simply try to interpret their "words", you could easily miss what the person is really asking for. For example, a child asking for "help drawing a picture" might not be asking for an extra hand as much as wanting quality time spent with your full attention.

The five languages are:

Words of Affirmation
This language involves reassurance that you are paid attention to. Many of us lead busy lives and can take each other for granted. We miss those little touches - the "I love you" or "thank you" that can mean so much. When someone uses this language, they are seeking confirmation that they are still special in your eyes.

Receiving Gifts
This language looks for physical items that provide a lasting symbol of love. An example might be a boyfriend who longs to have a photo of his girlfriend, to be able to carry it in his wallet and look at her face whenever he wishes to.

Quality Time
Modern times are full of hustle, bustle and speed. Gone are the days where a casual walk to the market could take up an entire morning, with plenty of time to stop and talk with neighbors along the way. Most of us crave a period of quality time with those we love, to truly focus on each other.

Acts of Service
If someone is feeling stressed and overworked, sometimes it is not gifts or words they crave - but some help. A harried mom might like flowers - but would really LOVE someone to take the kids to the zoo for the day and give her some peace and quiet for herself.

Physical Touch
Human beings are made with thousands of touch sensors - and touch is an integral part of the way people relate to each other. There are many times that a long hug, or a snuggle, chases away the fears and sadnesses of the world.

For more information on this fascinating topic, check out Dr. Chapman's website!

The Five Love Languages
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Content copyright © 2014 by Lisa Shea. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Lisa Shea. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Lauren DīSilva for details.

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