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Best Moves for Repairing Your Relationship

Guest Author - Maria Hester, M.D.

Relationships can literally make or break our happiness. It has often been said that love makes the world go round. That being said, it follows that we need someone to love to keep us in orbit. But no one ever said relationships are easy. Sometimes our relationships build us up, while at other times they seem to tear us down. While we cannot control what others do to us, we can control how we treat others.

If you feel estranged from someone you care about, take the following steps:

Assess the situation objectively.

Sometimes stepping back and taking a look at the broader picture can help you put things in perspective. We all have different triggers that make us feel upset, hurt, and angry. Your trigger may not be the same as the trigger of that person you love. Ask a confidant her opinion regarding the problem in your relationship. She may shed some light on the matter in a way that you have not considered.

The wisest man who ever lived, King Solomon of Israel, taught his readers not to focus on what others say about you, because if you are truly honest with yourself you will be forced to admit that you have cursed others in your heart also . When you step back and think about all the not so nice things you have said (if only to yourself) you may be able to see more clearly how and why someone else could have foolishly said or done something to hurt you.

Be willing to humble yourself and make the first move to repair the relationship.

This can be hard. By nature, we humans are proud and stubborn. If someone has wronged us we are not keen on running behind her smiling and setting ourselves up for another right hook to the heart. Yet, it can be very satisfying to make that first move toward mending an important relationship, even when you believe in your heart that you did nothing wrong in the first place. Chances are, the other person believes she did nothing wrong either, so if no one makes the first move to repair the relationship it may just fade into oblivion.

Take a look around you. The world is full of people killing others due to greed, hatred, or sometimes just for fun. Every 30 seconds a child dies unnecessarily for no reason other than he is too poor to afford basic food, clothing, shelter, and medical care. Each day someone dies unexpectedly and leaves loved ones behind who are overwhelmed by the loss and by the guilt they feel from not showing that person how much he was loved while he was alive.

You have a set number of days on this earth. Since love makes the world go round, why not spend your days accumulating as much love and peace as you can?
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Surviving a toxic relationship with dignity
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Content copyright © 2015 by Maria Hester, M.D.. All rights reserved.
This content was written by Maria Hester, M.D.. If you wish to use this content in any manner, you need written permission. Contact Patricia Villani, MPA, PhD for details.


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