Guest Author - Krissi Danielsson

Anyone who has ever miscarried knows how devastating it is to lose a baby. If it's not the worst day of your life, it ranks at least in the top 10. But miscarriage is sadly common and many doctors deal with it every week, if not every day, so they view it as a routine occurrence and nothing extraordinary.

Through this regular exposure to miscarriage, many medical professionals may not realize that they are unconsciously making a terrible day worse for their patients. While doctors may see it every day, patients generally expect to have a baby when they get pregnant, and when that doesn't happen they need more from a doctor than a shrug of the shoulders and advice to go home and try again.

When you do end up with an unsympathetic doctor, you may feel like you're being treated like a statistic instead of a person. You will want answers as to why you lost your baby and you will need reassurance as you do decide to try again. You may face considerable anxiety in your next pregnancy, having lost your innocence about pregnancy and being constantly fearful of having your heart broken again. So what can you do?

Consider switching to a new practitioner

No matter what, it's always a good idea to take an active role in your healthcare. Ideally, if you are not happy with your doctor, the best course of action is to find one that will meet your needs better. Remember that not all doctors treat miscarriage patients like statistics; some will do everything in their power to help you understand what happened to you and take your concerns seriously in your next pregnancy, offering frequent monitoring via ultrasounds or preventative tests for the most common problems that relate to miscarriages. In the process of switching, you may want to interview potential doctors to ask them how they treat patients who have suffered losses. This will give you a good idea of what to expect when you do get pregnant again.

Talk to your current doctor

Switching doctors isn't always an option, unfortunately. If you live in a remote area or receive care through a military hospital, the supply of available doctors may be limited. Or you may have a type of insurance that requires a major bureaucratic undertaking to see a new doctor. In this case, you may want to consider discussing your feelings with your doctor. Remember, doctors are people too and a plea for compassion may fall on sympathetic ears. Many patients keep silent and nod, only to complain to their spouses and friends later when doctors don't offer more reassurance. But you may be surprised; your doctor may just not realize how anxious you are. If you discuss the matter openly, maybe he or she can make accommodations to the normal policy.

Educate yourself

Being a well-infomed patient will make you feel more like an active participant in your own healthcare. Read miscarriage articles on the Web and surf Google News for the latest miscarriage-related headlines. Take notes on the information you learn and bring your questions to your doctor. It just may be that you discover something your doctor may have overlooked. Remember, however, that a few hours of Internet reading does not equal medical training. While it is not possible to self-diagnose, you can bring suggestions to your doctor for discussion on whether investigation may be appropriate.

Seek out miscarriage support groups

If all else fails, it can help to commiserate with others experiencing the same things. Visit the miscarriage support groups mentioned in the links section to network with others in the same boat.