Guest Author - Linda J. Paul

As I was getting dressed for work the other day, I realized that I had lost something.

"Honey," I called to my husband, "Have you seen my waist?" I was certain that it was somewhere in the house, but it definitely was not in between my breasts and my hips. Gravity had worked it's magic and the sand was stuck in the middle of my once hour-glass figure.

Recently I turned fifty-two. It was not as tough for me as it might have been, because for some reason I thought that I was going to be fifty-five on my birthday. So, it was a joy and a relief to know that I had lost three years in the process.

Gone are the days of trying to decide what type of maxi-pad or tampon was the politically correct choice. The biggest decision I am faced with these days is where I left my glasses so that I can see to find my glasses.

As an Minister, I often find myself counseling women in their forties and fifties. Often their main concern is that they feel they are less desirable than they were in their twenties and thirties. I tell them that perhaps it is not that they are less desirable, but rather that the men who find them desirable are in their forties, fifties and even sixties. Support hose and bifocals have now replaced tight jeans and firm abdominal muscles.

But, in spite of gravity, memory loss and sexual insecurities, being an older woman in the world of today is a far-sight better than the world that our mothers and grandmothers were up against. We are more independent, outspoken and self assured than the women of the past. And, We are a powerful and productive presence in today's workforce, and we live longer and healthier lives.

Turning fifty is a rite of passage in a woman's life. In most cases she is finished with or at the end of menopause. Her children are either in their late teens or early adulthood, and they are no longer reliant upon her for their physical needs.

Our society is big on celebrating rites of passage. Jewish tradition honors the process of entering into adulthood. We celebrate births, weddings and funerals.
What has been lacking is a ceremony that honors and respects the wisdom of the elders in our "tribe."

Recently, Croning ceremonies have become popular. A woman becomes a Crone once she is through menopause, or in some cases becomes a grandmother. During her Croning ceremony, the woman sits in a chair in the middle of a circle of family and friends. She wears a royal purple cape, and a crown. Each person in the circle comes forward and places a small gift or token of appreciation in the Crone's lap. As the people present their gifts, stories may be told about how the Crone has had an effect on their lives, what she has taught them, and how they honor her wisdom. I have very fond and wonderful memories of my own Croning.

I love being a Crone. I feel better, look better, and am more self confident now than I have ever been before, even if I still haven't found my waist.