Guest Author - Kelli Deister

Have you ever sat down to work on a large jigsaw puzzle? It is actually quite easy to sit there and pass several hours, while you attempt to find just the right fit for each puzzle piece. Sometimes that experience can be rewarding, especially when you’ve suddenly discovered that you have completed the puzzle and can now see it in the big picture. Alternately, there are times when it is most frustrating and you would prefer to throw the pieces against the wall and forget about it!

For those with any level of deafness, lip reading can be a similar experience on either side of the spectrum. There can be times when a Deaf person can understand the jest of what a hearing person is trying to tell them, and communication flows somewhat smoothly. However, I believe these instances are rare in occurrence. More likely to happen, are those moments when the Deaf individual is expected to read the lips of a hearing person, and cannot -- ending in extreme frustration.

It is my belief that many hearing individuals expect those that are Deaf to adjust to their idealized world. Many Deaf students are taught how to use their voices while they sign. They are also expected to read lips, which brings me to the main point of this article. Have you ever tried to communicate solely by reading the lips of the one conversing with you? It is, in my opinion, a phonetic impossibility. For instance, try to say the words pain and paint, while standing in front of the mirror. Now try to say the words ten and tent. Can you see any visible difference in those variations? In my belief, there aren’t any.

Expecting a person, with any level of deafness, to follow along with a conversation merely by reading lips, is to make a silent request of them to conform to your world. From experience, I can attest to the fact that it is both difficult and belittling, when forced to try to communicate by guessing the words of my peers.

I recommend that the hearing community practice respect for the Deaf community, by accepting them as the unique individuals that they are. Many times, we talk of the many languages that we learn, in addition to English. Yet, oftentimes, when it comes to the Deaf and American Sign Language, those that are hearing seem to silently demand that the Deaf conform to the hearing methods of communication. American Sign Language is a beautiful language, with its own grammatical structure. I am proud to be a part of the Deaf community, and equally proud to assert the fact that my preferred method of communication is not lip reading, but American Sign Language.