One of the hardest things, for me, about having fibromyalgia, is the disappointments it caused my son. My son was 2 years old when I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I tried to be an involved parent throughout his younger school years by attending field trips, field days, PTA meetings, book fairs and even sport activities.
Sometimes, though, I could barely make it out of bed, much less go on a hiking field trip. At times, I would feel guilty thinking that I robbed my son of a "normal" mama. I would get angry at myself, angry that I had fibro-just totally ticked off that I couldn't keep up with life. Have you ever felt like that whether you had young children or not?
You may wonder...
- Will I ever be able to measure up to some of the other parents who seem to have boundless energy and just enjoy the whole process?
- Will I force my children to grow up before their time because mommy just canít do things?
- Am I destining them to a life filled with disappointments and broken promises because "MAMA CANíT"?
The truth is that Iím dog-tired almost all the time. The demands of fibro and parenthood just donít mesh very well. Our children see that we can barely off the couch. Theyíve been afraid that mommy will die.
Here's when you get creative. Instead of focusing on what you can't do with your children, focus on what you can do. Today, there are smart phones, tablets, laptops, video games...before you know it, we'll be able to look at the wall and entertain ourselves. When he was younger, we had line dancing Friday ( low impact exercise) doing the Cha Cha Slide, the Ghetto Walk, and the Electric Slide. Now that he's sixteen, my son and I compare levels on Candy Crush and Pet Saga and watch You Tube videos streaming through his Wii box. If you feel that your children will resent you later because you couldn't do certain things, don't worry. They'll remember the scrapbook that you made together of your favorite things. They'll remember the Family Feud video games off of the Wii. They'll remember how bad mama sounded when she sang karaoke off of a lyrics You Tube video streaming on your flat screen TV.
For Further Reading on the Subject (for yourself and your young children, if you have them), why not check out these books?