Test, test, TEST. The word test can have a reaction on your son anywhere from a wrinkled up nose to full-fledged vomiting. The fear can be so strong that even your stomach turns when your son announces that he has a test coming soon. Its only normal for you to feel for your son. You know what he is going through. And believe it or not, its only normal for your son to be nervous about a test coming up. However, what is unhealthy is to have a fear so strong that it actually blocks any answers to the test, causes unusual or stressful physical symptoms.

You help your son make flash cards while he is learning his multiplication tables in third grade and also his periodic table in 11th grade. You have helped him rehearse his spelling words all through elementary school and his list of history dates in middle school. His vocabulary words have seemed to get harder and harder from second grade through his physics class in high school.

He leaves for school. You and he are both sure that he knows his material. Surely he will smile when the test is passed out and will sail right through the several pages stapled together. His heart will be light, his eyes will be bright and with sharpened pencil he will conquer the world! Well at least his little part in it, third row, fifth chair.

Instead something else occurs. His hands get sweaty, he snaps his pencil. He starts eating his eraser and his sneakers are banging against his chair. He looks around to see if everyone else is working and writing. How come they have the answers? Why don’t I know this? His brain has completely shut down. He knew them when he left the house but somewhere from the house to his classroom, they left him. Not only is this not fair, but its maddening and frustrating.

He comes home from school. He has a note in his pocket from the teacher saying he was disruptive in class. You are firm with him. He doesn’t know how to tell you that he is frustrated from not knowing the test and probably failing. He kicks his door, is short with you, and hates his baby sister. All because his brain blocked the answers for the test.

How do you solve this problem? There are a couple of ideas. And hopefully you can catch this in elementary school so that it is not a problem in middle school and in high school.
*One of my sons had a remarkable teacher that noticed this in my son. Before the test, she would take a black magic marker and cross off the word “Test” on the top of the page and write in “Worksheet”. He wouldn’t sit there and stare at the word “test” or “exam” and get more frustrated or worried.
*Contact your son’s guidance department. There are a few things that can be done either outside of having him listed as an Exceptional Student Education. Rules vary from state to state, so the first thing to do is to contact the guidance counselors for their advice. If the guidance department deems necessary to put him into that category, wonderful. There will be plans for your son. Such as having the test read to him, having him take the test in a more comfortable environment, having more test taking time. There are many options available.
* Talk to your son’s teacher. Let her know about his anxiety and have her watch for symptoms and signs of panic and frustration. There have been teachers that I have known in the past that will allow a student to do an oral exam. If your son knows the content of his test, then a simple conversation between student and teacher will let the teacher know that he indeed knows the subject material and grade accordingly. This will work best for middle and high school age boys.
*Reassure your son that taking a test is not the end of the world. Although he should study and know his material, if he does not do well does not mean he will not succeed in life.
Let him know that he can count on you to help him study and prepare. Also let him know that your love for him is unconditional. Your love for your son has nothing to do with receiving an A or F. He is trying so hard to impress you, make you happy and proud, that removing that pressure might be the simple trick to losing the test anxiety.

I want to thank the teacher who reminded me of this subject when I told her I was writing for Bellaonline. She has taught for years and has found several ways to have a student work to their full potential and eliminate as much stress and anxiety in their path.
Thank you Linda!