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The Ball and The Jar
I call it the ball and jar analogy. Often I find myself referring back to it when I need help with my grieving, which includes my levels of patience and tolerance. This is my interpretation.
What Is Selfish When You Are Grieving?
Do I have a new code of moral ethics that rationalizes selfishness for my survival?
Grils, Dinner's Ready
I’ve always called it the bewitching hour. That hour before dinner. The hour when everyone melts down from their day. I miss it so much.
It's Mother's Day Again
Today I write in honor of all moms who have lost their precious children.
The Week of School Vacation is Wretched
It’s school vacation week again, a time of the school season I used to really love because I could just hang out with my daughters. But now I dread it.
We Saw a Medium
It is a natural feeling to want to connect with your loved one after death. There is a need for reassurance that they are o.k. no matter what you may or may not believe.
What Are The Odds?
Now and again you might think “what if” something happened to my child but you quickly dismiss the thought because it is too painful and frightening to imagine; it strikes a nerve so deep that you avoid the subject at all costs.
Having an Everyday Conversation
Often I find myself apologizing for talking about my deceased daughter. I’m so conscious of the discomfort of others that I tend to say “I'm sorry” after I bring my personal heartache into a conversation.
Masking Our Grief
In the early days after your child dies, it can be quite clear to the outside world what stage of grief you are in - shock, anger, etc. But as times passes, they see us functioning again, maybe even having a laugh. Do they think we're "over it"? We learn to hide our grief behind a mask.
Words I'll Never Get Used To
I had a ban on all terminology that conveyed death and loss. Saying “my daughter died” was literally impossible. But so was using the phrase “my daughter passed away” or “we lost our daughter”. I avoided phrases such as “I almost died…” or “I would kill for…” or “I died when…”.
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