This is lesson 25 in the series "Conquering Codependency - Loving Without Leaning" looking at aspects of codependency from a spiritual point of view. Each of the 48 lessons includes a prayer or meditation.

We usually think of selfishness as self-centeredness. But, what is viewed by an onlooker as selfishness may be legitimate self-giving, particularly if the action is in response to a real need to maintain personal health, peace of mind, housing, livelihood, or care-taking needs of children or parents.

Meditation for Reflection

Begin by sitting in a quiet place with your hands folded in your lap or palms up or down on your thighs. Close your eyes and begin even regular breathing, such as breathe in counts 1, 2; breathe out counts 3, 4; breathe in counts 1, 2 and continue the pattern without actually saying or thinking the counts.

Breathing evenly, reflect on these thoughts -

Selfishness is the use of energy, time or resources fulfilling a lesser purpose than what is for the good of the situation. Self-giving uses the same energy, time or resources to act for the best resolution.

In selfishness our thoughts are concerned with keeping something to ourselves, which tenses us up and can lead to a whole list of tension-related illnesses.

In self-giving our thoughts remain positive, and our body, by not holding tension remains relaxed, yet alert.

Selfish or self-giving? It is easier to allow the natural flow of energy to run through us by being caring in relationships, than to feel tension by being selfish.

Self-Giving Prayer

“May I remember
What is here on planet earth is for our use
To usefully care for ourselves and responsibilities.
And that positive attitudes,
Loving concern, caring actions
Energize optimally, allowing good health
Body, mind, soul.”

Finish your meditation with a deep breath in and out and write any new insights in your journal for later review.

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Article and photo credit - Susan Kramer