Guest Author - Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

Why not give your self-image a boost today? Before you even internalize these new thinking habits, you'll improve your body image.

Admit you're not a mind reader. You may think that the guy in the elevator or on the bus is thinking that your zits are ugly or your bottom is too large…but he's not. He's thinking about work, the music in his Ipod, or absolutely nothing at all (the men I know do that a lot). You probably think your partner is distracted by your cellulite or extra weight, but it's only YOU who's distracted. Your partner is enjoying the sensations and feelings – and you should be, too. You can't read their minds, so don't even go there. Especially, don't attribute your thoughts to other people! You're more often than not wrong; you're simply hurting yourself when you pretend you know what they're thinking.

Let go of the all-or-nothing beliefs. If your hair isn't perfect or your skin flawless, you can't relax and enjoy yourself on dates or at parties – or you refuse to go at all. If you don't feel perfectly put together, you feel bad about yourself. You believe your appearance is all or nothing: all good, or all bad. Instead of thinking this way, take the good with the bad. Your hair isn't looking exactly right? Wear your favorite outfit or hat. You feel bloated because your period's on its way? Drink extra water (it's counterintuitive, but it works) and go for a long walk, swim, or jog.

Focus on your passions. Forget about your skin, weight, size, and shape. What do you love to do? What gets you excited, makes you forget that time is passing? Maybe you've always wanted to travel, paint, or explore the antique shops in the funky part of your town. When you explore new things or concentrate on what makes you happy, you're less likely to feel bad about your body, personality, or mind.

Stop hiding. As hard as it is, reveal yourself to others. I don't just mean physically (though that can be healthy and affirming) – I mean emotionally. If you feel self-conscious about your belly or thighs, talk about it with your partner. Share your vulnerable feelings with the people you trust. Often, they'll reassure you and tell you they love you no matter what – and you only need to let yourself believe them.

Remember the mind-body connection. Your body is so tied in with your mind that simply thinking about stressful situations raises your blood pressure, increases your heart rate, and lowers your immune system. If you keep thinking about how ugly or fat you feel, your physical health will suffer right alongside your emotional health.