Guest Author - Linda Steele
It has been ingrained into us since an early age that we should be kind to animals and considerate of other people. But, are we kind to ourselves? If you find that you are beating yourself up on a regular basis or are plagued by guilt more often than not, you may want to make an effort to be a bit kinder to yourself. Remember you are a person too. Here are some ideas to show a little kindness for your good self.
Do One Thing at a Time
Let’s face it, we live in a face-paced world and we have all tried to juggle one too many projects at the same time. This can be extremely difficult to deal with as well as very stressful. Sometimes when we try to do several things at once, we feel a sense of self importance. But at what cost? Stress causes a variety of illnesses and diseases such as high blood pressure, hyperglycemia, cardiovascular disease, type II diabetes mellitus as well as anxiety disorders, depression and post-traumatic stress disorder due to the excessive cortisol levels released during periods of stress. Instead value simplicity and do one thing at a time. When you focus on the task at hand, you are not only being kind to yourself, but you will be able to do things much more effectively.
Yesterday is History
If we have done something wrong, know that it is the past. Most of us live in the past constantly brooding over what we can not change. This leads to feelings of guilt and regret. If we have made mistakes in the past, we should not feel that this is our permanent reality. One of my favorite sayings is “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is the future, today is a gift. That is why we call it the present”. So instead of reliving history, focus on the present moment and see how you can improve and go forward. By focusing on the present, we can learn from the past.
Dedicate Time for Self
Most of our day is spent pleasing other people - 8-10 hours a day in the office not to mention the time commuting, a few hours here and there to squeeze in time to catch up with friends amongst the hours spent dealing with our family’s needs - yet we can’t find 15 - 20 minutes to look after ourself. If we dedicated just 15-20 minutes a day, we can learn how to relax, meditate and find a moment of calm in the rush of daily life.
Meditation is an activity that calms the mind and keeps it focused on the present. In the meditative state, the mind is not cluttered with thoughts or memories of the past, nor is it concerned with future events. Meditation, which has been practiced for thousands of years, is an effective means of treating stress, controlling anxiety, enhancing the immune system, and reducing conditions such as high blood pressure. Meditation has also been used successfully to treat chronic pain and it can benefit those who have heart disease and hypertension.
The effectiveness of meditation gives the mind enhanced clarity. You may be surprised to find that this 20 minutes of quiet reflection makes you more productive and you don’t actually lose any time at all.
Don’t Seek to Meet the Expectations of Others
Do you have one of those people in your life? You know, someone who is quite demanding and places unrealistic expectations on us. If you want to be kind to yourself, don’t feel obliged to meet the expectations of others. If you try to please everyone, you will always be striving for an unattainable goal.
Remember Your Positive Contributions
Sometimes our mistakes and faults stick in our mind more than the good things we have done. At the end of the day, take time to remember some of the positive things you have accomplished. They don’t have to be big achievements. Perhaps you gave up your seat on the metro that day, gave your change to someone in need or told someone how much you appreciate them. Sometimes a kind word to other people makes all the difference.
Be Happy
Life is meant to be enjoyed. It is when we are happy and in a good consciousness that can we be of greatest service to ourselves and others.
If you adopt just one of these ideas, you are on the road to being a little kinder to yourself. Who knows, you just may like it and start doing it more and in different ways.
