Develop Healthy Selfishness

Develop Healthy Selfishness
Healthy Selfishness – if you are a woman, those two little words may seem foreign to you. Most women are lacking in the area of healthy selfishness. We are taught from an early age to think that it is bad to take care of ourselves first.

We often give away too much of ourselves, often unconsciously. We have been instilled with the belief that our worth comes from our relationships with others. We have been taught to always be “kind” to others, to wait until everyone else has been served at mealtimes, to give the bigger piece of the cake to someone else, to let someone else go first, and to generally acquiesce to others.

When we concentrate on other's needs as a way to achieve self-esteem for ourselves, we end up neglecting our own needs. Healthy selfishness is the foundation to establish high self-esteem. Healthy selfishness is the belief that you deserve to have your needs met, to express your thoughts and feelings, and to have your desires in all areas of your life.

Recently, my husband and I were on a 17-day vacation in the Southwest. Since I practice healthy selfishness, when we arrived in Las Vegas where there is one luxurious spa after another, I decided I needed to be a little selfish so I scheduled a “Spa Day” consisting of a Rose Petal Body Wrap and a Deep Tissue Massage at Spa Mandalay.

After using the various thermal spas and steam room, I settled in with a magazine and a snack in the Quiet Room until the therapist came to get me for my body wrap. The therapist came to get me after a few minutes and led me to the treatment room. When I saw that the hallway leading into the room and the massage table where sprinkled with rose petals, I immediately begin to feel like a Queen. Next, warm water cascaded over my body as she did a gentle exfoliation with a salt scrub with rose essential oil.

After a warm shower, I came back to a newly made massage table where more rose petals were scattered. As I laid on the soft petals, my mind began to truly relax as the scent of rose permeated the air. I was scheduled for a deep tissue massage later, I opted to have my feet and hands massaged during the massage portion of this treatment.

My hands and feet were greeted with warm paraffin after the massage. Then I was wrapped in a heated blanket for 20 minutes. I was thinking that this is the ultimate until she placed cool cucumbers on my eyes and dabbed my forehead and face with a cold cloth. Who knew that attention to the details could feel so wonderful to the senses? I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Unfortunately, time goes too fast when you are in a state of utter bliss. I was brought back to reality when I was slowly unwrapped from my warm cocoon and told that my body wrap was now complete. I felt my skin which felt soft and emollient. My therapist thanked me and led me back to the Quiet Room where I awaited my massage therapist who would relieve the remaining tension and aches that I had been experiencing from all of our hiking.

By taking time to practice healthy selfishness, the feelings I experienced both physically, mentally and spiritually stayed with me for days after the actual treatment. Allowing your sense of self to rest entirely in the hands of others is too risky. You need to be able to identify your own needs and develop a plan to get your needs met. How can you show yourself a little healthy selfishness today? Make your plan and do it!

If you would like more information about Spa Mandalay at Mandalay Bay Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas, NV you can visit their website at

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